That's in quotes for a reason: someone actually said it. It is a sentence that must, by obligation, be put in quotation marks because - as improbable as it seems - it was actually uttered. Odd, I know, to think that such a misguided and sad idea could be expressed by a friend of mine, and even sadder to come to the realization that there are many who share the same viewpoint. It has started me thinking. The statement is flawed and hypocritical by its own selfish trappings so I won't spend any time on why I think it should be disregarded. I will rather express the thoughts that have been occupying my mind all day as I contemplate my place within this idea of selfishness by artful expression. The thought that is reoccurring most frequently in my mind is the following: What do I have to offer?
So what do I have to offer? I am not speaking of myself in a marital sense, as in "What can I bring to the table in a relationship?" but rather "What can I bring to the world?" It's not as deeply existential as the question may lead one to believe. What do I have to offer the world? How can I better it? How can I change or influence it? Within this, there lies many paths. Each is unique, and each is important. But we cannot fool ourselves into thinking that a path which diverges from what many would define as "normalcy" is a lesser path. The artist's influence, while perhaps unfelt and unseen by many is just as imperative to the world as the influence of lawmakers, powerful businessmen, politicians and doctors. You know, the "normal professions."
So what can I offer? I have only that which I can create and that which I am given. I cannot force interest or talent in areas where they do not exist in me. I cannot pretend that I understand the deep inner-workings of an equation. I cannot pretend that I would like to. I cannot feign interest in the things in which I would normally have no interest. So why force myself into an education, career and life devoted to it? Why pretend that I could be effective in accomplishing important goals by surrounding myself in that for which I have no talent or ability. I am what I am, and I am who I am. I have certain abilities and talents which are unique to me, and for that I am thankful. I am no lawyer or politician, and for that I am thankful. I am no biochem major, no physicist in training. I have to offer that which I have, that which I am. I cannot change that. What I can do is refine and hone that which I have. In doing so I will a greater impact on the environment around me than I could in any other way. I have talent for the arts. How can I fool myself into thinking that my life would be more affecting by denying them and turning myself to scholarly pursuits accepted by the masses? In all truth I can only be effective by being who I am. I cannot have the same influence or impact in hiding my abilities or denying them in order to pursue a "marketable" career. Saying that a point comes where one must grow up and pick a big-boy job is an idea as ludicrous as saying that a talented and gifted doctor would have more success in life by leaving his practice and painting.
Why is it a selfish pursuit to hone and perfect the abilities that I have been given? Those who are gifted in thought, in science or in mathematics certainly use education to further deepen their knowledge and abilities in their crafts, why is it not the same for me? Why am I a fool for wanting to further my abilities in my own craft? It is a fallacy to think that it is selfishness that leads many to do that which they love. It is a fallacy to believe that pursuing one's dreams is left only to the artists. It is a pursuit that should drive all of those seeking education in their respective fields. We can all better our capacity to offer something to the world. The lawyer may grow in his knowledge of the law, the doctor in his ability to understand the human body, the taxi driver the fastest route and the artist his craft. Each of us can offer the world what we have. That which we have we can improve and refine. But taking that which is innate and ignoring it for that which is accepted is a disservice to ourselves, seeing as we rob ourselves the ability to fulfill the extent of our own potential. Again, this extends to all realms of ability. We cannot rob the world of a good surgeon, a good mechanic or a good executive by ignoring our natural gifts, abilities and tendencies. The world cannot afford it. Whatever it is that we are, we cannot positively or as powerfully affect the world by denying or changing it. We can never achieve our potential by deceiving ourselves.
So in summation, I can only offer that which I am and that which I have. Anything else would be either a lie or a disservice, and would not be as affecting. To refine one's ability in that which one loves is, in fact, the antithesis of selfish. True selfishness would be to deny the world that which one could offer.
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